I don’t know how to effectively reach my yoga students to engage them in Movement - Worship - Breath during isolation. I have been thrust into the world of technology, while mourning for plans that were cancelled. School busses stopped picking up my children which created a quiet work environment at home. The already challenging working conditions for my husband have been exacerbated, increasing his tension and decreasing his patience. We are a family grieving a life we didn’t appreciate when we had it.

I don’t understand, or have interest in, technology the way some do. I didn’t grow up with it - and yes, that is my excuse. In high school computers were a thing, but they were used mostly to write papers, play Oregon Trail, email, and perhaps, if your parents let you, for hanging out in chat rooms. MySpace started when I was in college, but I thought the idea of social media was kind of silly. I couldn’t understand why would spend time talking with people I would probably never meet.

I got my first cell phone the summer of 2001. It was thick and heavy, the antenna pulled out, and I usually left it at home. I was convinced the wavelengths we were exposing our brains to on these mobile devices would lead to cancer, and I didn’t want to be a part of it. There was an awkward pitch that would resonate from the phone when in use. Plus, the sound on the land line was so much clearer!

I have never stood in line for the next best thing. If my current things are working, then why would I spend time and money getting a new thing? (This answers, for some, why my sweaters look “vintage.” High school was a long time ago!). I have my possessions, I take care of them, and I only update when I have to. If you listen really closely, you might be able to hear my pennies screaming for mercy!!! Yes, I have been known to be stingy. I am working on becoming more gracious.

I guess it’s time for me to update, but I don’t know what I’m doing. I have been seeking different wisdom while in waiting. Now I feel like I am behind the curve and it’s super uncomfortable. I am starting to wonder if I even need to know what I am doing.

If you are right with God, He strengthens you for the journey; the Eternal will be pleased with your life. - Psalm 37:23 (THE VOICE)

WAITING FOR WISDOM

January 4, 2020 Michelle Brinkley

I have become painfully aware that I still have a lot of spiritual growth to do. I have changed and developed over the years, with the help of Jesus, but I have not always been prayerful and meditative in the process. This has caused me to move in ignorance at times, and potentially made my growth more painful than it needed to be. I am a firm believer that God can use all things for His glory, including when we make selfish choices; but when we head down the “I’ll do it myself” road like a stubborn toddler, then the growing pains often feel more raw and take a little more time to fully comprehend.

We are living in a society overcome with hurry. Everything that is fast is better.

Fast food.

Fast information.

Fast shipments.

And often this idea of “faster is better” bleeds into our faith, personal growth, and healing too. There is, however, no Biblical example of fast. God spread creation over seven days. The Israelis were promised a land flowing with milk and honey, but they wandered and traveled for years before arriving. Jesus lived, learned, and matured for 30 years before starting his world changing ministry. Although Jesus and his disciples were able to perform miracles of healing that were instantaneous, how long did those individuals wait patiently and prayerfully for their healing?

Why are we so consumed with the idea that faster is somehow better? The development of a personal relationship with Jesus, a yoga practice, and balanced mental health take time. It’s hard to set aside time to wait, to meditate, to choose wisdom, because waiting often seems like a waste of time, or like its holding us back from moving forward, or like we aren’t getting anything done. Meditation is a discipline of creating stillness in your body, mind, and soul so you can get aligned with His calling for you. You simply cannot meditate fast. But why would you want to? This is sacred time you are offering Jesus to sort out the Truth from the lies and calibrate your vision so you can confidently walk your path.

My Jesus and yoga journey began 10 years ago, and have been with me through many seasons of growth. I have grown to accept this is the physical earthly tent my spirit was created to dwell in, and it is good. God doesn’t make junk, so I shouldn’t treat it like junk. My disordered eating has become a fully healed wound, but it wasn’t a miraculous transition. This was the first of many wounds that I cried out to God to heal from my mat. I really thought I wanted a lightning bolt moment for wholeness, but God, in His infinite goodness and grace, let me walk the long bumpy road to recovery so I could fight each deceitful demon on the way, reclaiming my wholeness in Christ. It takes time for us to open our fists to let go of our ignorance and allow God to clean out our wounds. It’s uncomfortable!

For example: When we fall and get a deep physical abrasion, often there are tiny particulates of whatever we fell on left in the wound itself. Cleaning the laceration is medically required, and often painful, in order to get out all the foreign materials to prevent infection and promote healing. Without this important and often time consuming step, the wound may re-open or not heal properly.

We cannot expect God to do all the work for us and provide us with healing and wisdom when we haven’t done our part. Waiting and meditating may be uncomfortable, painful, and time consuming; but it is in these moments with Christ that He leads us to His Truth and creates sustainable change from the inside out. He is the one that will pick us up when we fall down, clean our wounds carefully, bandage them appropriately, and continue to apply His healing balm regularly, until the day we accept the scar left behind. The scar is a trophy of overcoming, so use it to empower yourselves, and build His Kingdom by sharing its story. The path that leads to Truth and wisdom is led by Christ, and best walked slowly. Take all the time you need. Faster is not better.

In 2020 I will strive to lead MWB Yoga from a more authentic place (this blog is a piece of the journey) and seek opportunities for more collaboration. We each have a personal path, but God did not create us to walk it alone. We are a community! As a community, please lift each other (and me too, please) up in prayer regularly, try to create safe space for others to share their wounds, and remember that through waiting we gain wisdom. It is uncomfortable, but with Jesus, walk to the edge of your light and take a step. There’s no rush. He is with you. Do it afraid… I am.

“Meditation brings wisdom; lack of meditation leaves ignorance. Know well what leads you forward and what holds you back, and choose the path that leads to wisdom.” – Buddha